Friday, April 30, 2010

but dad.... which kid?

So I've been super impressed with Diego and Roman's ability to cope with the new baby (Mat) joining the family. Diego was already an expert at having a baby around. He's been super helpful throwing away diapers, finding the pacifier, fetching toys, changing diapers, burping, etc. I'm just kidding... we don't make him fetch toys.

Diego is 4 now and he's got amazing reasoning skills; sometimes he'll catch me off guard and I realize I need to be careful what and how I say things to him. It's not his fault if I don't give him sufficient and effective information for him to perform the task I'm asking. Here's what I mean.

Roman must have ninja DNA and will probably be a great Navy Seal one day. Crystal usually takes Mat upstairs around 8 PM to get him ready for bed. Diego and Roman usually hang out with me. This night Diego and I were watching some awesome concert on Palladia, probably something I wanted to watch, and Roman disappeared. Not like I didn't hear him leave, but was here one second and gone the next. I called out for him but started picking up their toys so I figured I could send my kid assistant to find him. I told Diego, "hey bud, can you go find your brother." He doesn't skip a beat and I hear a faint "sure" as he's turning the corner to run upstairs. I continued to pick up toys and stuff of the floor when I hear a puzzled "um, dad?" I said, "yes son" and Diego asks... "but dad, which kid?"

You see for nearly 2 years I've watched Diego become his brother's keeper and having Mat around is new and I still haven't mentally made Diego responsible for him. Naturally when I asked him to find "his brother" I was referring to captain sneaky aka Roman, but Diego being the awesome big brother that he is was already thinking of both younger siblings.

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

1.......2................3...(4 mom?)

Discipline for 2 soon to be 3 boys is very hard. Their personalities are sooooo different yet they seem to act up in the same ways.

One thing I picked up from my parents growing up was "the count." This is effective when delivered as follows:

step 1: child acts up (ie; touches something he's not supposed to)
step 2: request that the child stop
step 3: if the child does not stop, bust out the belt.... j/k request again and warn of consequences if child does not cease and desist
step 4: child does not react to steps 1-3
step 5: child has used 2 of 3 possible strikes and will get the count as the final warning before retribution
step 6: in an even monotone pace (approx 60 bpm) count from 1 - 3
step 7: if child has not displayed desired reaction use discipline of choice now (scolding, timeout, spanking, leather bull whip, electric chair, etc, etc)

UNLESS....

your child is like my #2 son Roman Ezra (pictured)  currently 2 yrs old, in which case he looks up right around the count of 2 and smiles and gets ready to book it like a track star running the 1/4 mile on 3. My wife and I try very hard to be fair and count steadily every time; it's hard. Sometimes you say 1... 2... and then are tempted to give fractions of a second such as 2 1/2, 2 3/4, 2 7/8, 2 9/10 as additional opportunities for the child to do the right thing. However, you're only postponing the inevitable. I digress, my wife gets to 3 and as she reaches to grab him to administer punishment, he looks up at her and says in the most concerned voice "no mommy... 4 mommy... 4!" If this is your case, I'm still working on that one.